Sighs.
All I did was come across a journal prompt that allowed vulnerability, but instead of sitting with it alone, I decided to share it with you.
Most of us have heard the phrase, “You are your own biggest critic.” And honestly, sometimes I wonder… can you really blame us for that?
A lot of things shape the way we think about ourselves and the way we speak to ourselves. Experiences. People. Failure. Expectations. Comparisons. All of it slowly builds the voice that lives inside our heads.
And the thing is, we live with that voice constantly.
If it’s not talking to you, it’s making jokes, replaying memes in your head, telling you to look at a beautiful car or a beautiful person. Sometimes it feels comforting, and honestly, sometimes I wish we could stay there forever, in the version of our minds where the voice feels safe, familiar, and intimate.
But sometimes it gets out of character. Suddenly the voice becomes cruel.
“You’re not good enough.”
“You could’ve done better.”
“You’re so dumb.”
“Someone else would do it better than you.”
“You’re weak.”
“You’re ugly.”
And in those moments, your own mind stops feeling like home. You want silence. You want peace. You want the voice to stop speaking over you. And what’s even crazier is that sometimes we genuinely don’t know how to stop believing it.
But then comes the question that changes everything:
When you imagine your inner critic speaking to someone you love, how would you respond?
You’d probably be angry. Disgusted even. You wouldn’t want to be around someone who constantly tears down a person you care about. You would defend them immediately.
And maybe that’s where healing starts.
Because when it comes to people we love, we naturally challenge cruel words. You know your loved one is not weak, ugly, or stupid because you’ve seen them survive hard things. You’ve seen them shine. You’ve seen their strength even when they couldn’t see it themselves.
So why not challenge those thoughts when they’re directed at you too?
Tell yourself: “I know myself, and I am worthy of this opportunity because I worked for it.” Fight the criticism with evidence. Not empty motivation, evidence.
Another thing that helps is separating yourself from that voice. Name your inner critic. Seriously. Name it after that villain you hate so much. Because once you separate it from yourself, it becomes easier to recognize when it’s speaking instead of emotionally drowning in it.
And honestly? Sometimes humor helps, too. Treat it like an annoying hater. Roll your eyes at it. Don’t treat every thought like it deserves authority.
Another thing I’ve been learning is to replace “I can’t” with “I might.” “I can’t” feels final, heavy, and limiting. It’s like failure has already happened before you even tried.
But “I might”? “I might” leaves room for possibility. It leaves room for surprise, growth, and trying again.
It is Mental Health Month, and one thing I’ve realized is that some battles, like dealing with your inner critic, may stay with us for a long time. We spend so much of our lives inside our heads, sometimes more than we spend fully present in reality.
So, if we really are going to live in our minds every day, then maybe we should start making it a place worth living in. A softer place. A kinder place. A more compassionate place.
Because the same way you would never allow someone to constantly tear down a person you love is the same way, you shouldn’t allow your inner critic to constantly tear you down.
